My story began in my mid 20s with alcohol to fit in because I was a shy, very tall, skinny girl.
I was bullied and made fun of in school with very little friends. I craved a way to make friends
and feel part of. My solution was inviting people over my age during or after school and we all
drank out off a family member’s bar. It got so bad we would mark the bottles so when we were
done, we’d pour water in the bottles thinking my family wouldn’t notice. Eventually they did
the same thing to us so we were drinking out of almost all watered down bottles not noticing
because we were also doing multiple drugs at the same time. This is only a small example to
show what people will do to get alcohol if they are a true alcoholic. Some people go much
further to get alcohol because they can’t function without alcohol during the day to be able to
work, amongst other daily life responsibilities.
A journey in sobriety can be one of the hardest decisions in your life, especially if you have no
choice depending on how you get to the point of having to choose. It can also be one of easiest
choices of your life when you know you have reached the point of self-destruction and there is
no other choice when there is a small voice somewhere crying out saying I want to live, I can’t
do this anymore. It may not only be about saving yourself from a slow suicide, it may be about
saving a marriage, protecting your children, saving a job; basically, not losing everything if that
hasn’t already occurred. If you are sick you go to a doctor, if you find yourself wrapped in the
arms of alcoholism or addiction you must ask for help.
Personally, I preferred drugs, mostly cocaine. As time went on, I could not function as far as
work, taking care of myself and my infant child, constant lying, taking money and other things
from my family and others. Addiction is the only prison where the locks are on the inside.
Eighteen years later my family did an intervention with our family priest who took me to a 30-
day rehab about an hour away. He came to visit me every weekend, eventually two family
members came, and finally they brought my infant son. The rehab was amazing; I learned to
cope with my feelings, I learned to share in meetings to help myself let others get to know me
and befriend me, I learned to love myself and understand alcoholism and addiction IS a disease
that I must fight forever.
I currently have 27 wonderful years sober; I am employable, I am best friends with my son, I
have a network of sober friends that are amazing, I sponsor girls to help them on their path of
sobriety, I have an amazing sponsor who is also a drug and mental health counselor. I couldn’t
ask for more, sobriety is the best choice I ever made. Thanks for letting me share.
